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Et Tu, Gottman?

Et Tu, Gottman?

Posted by on Apr 14, 2016 in Challenging narratives, Common Myths, education, Gender, harm reduction, Mental health, Sex Therapy, Sexuality | 1 comment

So, I was getting ready to finally get off my tail and write my last Sound Relationship Dungeon entry, when a dear friend messaged me on Facebook Chat. He said: Aww, man! Gottman is hating on porn. He also¬†linked to this open letter from Gottman’s blog. Gottman writes: With pornography use, much more of a normal stimulus may eventually be needed to...

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The Oppression that Wasn’t There

The Oppression that Wasn’t There

Posted by on Jun 16, 2015 in Challenging narratives, Common Myths, education, Gender, Sexuality, Uncategorized | 0 comments

The Rachel Dolezal story has a lot of people shaking their heads. I’ll let Jon Stewart explain: http://thedailyshow.cc.com/videos/9pxi9w/whaaaaaaat—–black-ish-ish In the wake of this story breaking, pundits and bloggers of all political stripes have compared this story to Caitlyn Jenner’s coming out as trans. The term...

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Sound Relationship Dungeon Part 4: Turning Towards

Sound Relationship Dungeon Part 4: Turning Towards

Posted by on Mar 2, 2015 in Challenging narratives, Common Myths, education, Gender, Power Exchange, Sexuality, storify, Uncategorized | 0 comments

Whenever healthy kink is discussed or explained to people outside the “lifestyle,” the primary focus is on consent. According to prevailing wisdom, so long as everyone involved is a functioning adult, and all parties consent, everything is kosher. While consent is super important, it is not the only characteristic of healthy kink. Necessary but...

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Kink, Race, Privilege

Posted by on Jan 12, 2015 in Challenging narratives, Common Myths, education, Gender, Sexuality, Uncategorized | 0 comments

A few weeks ago, This article came across my Facebook feed. In the wake of Ferguson and the Eric Garner shootings, the author Britt Bennet wrote a very powerful piece about her complicated relationship to privilege and race. I often hear good white people ask why people of color must make everything about race, as if we enjoy considering racism as a...

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The Art of Pickup vs. Real Power

The Art of Pickup vs. Real Power

Posted by on Jul 28, 2014 in Abuse, Challenging narratives, Gender, Pickup Artists, Power Exchange, Seduction, Seduction community, Sexuality, Uncategorized | 0 comments

In one of my more masochistic moments, I made the mistake of reading up on the world of pickup artists (PUAs) and related online communities. Two sites in particular caught me like a deer in headlights: a reddit post about using operant conditioning to “train” women, and the blog of pickup artist RooshV, whose views on women and relationships...

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